A week I'd like to forget

Things have been very challenging for me to say the least over the last few weeks. The amount of time and energy I have been putting into my folks has been great . . .and very frustrating to say the least. The flood and then my father having to go to the hospital has been too much. I don't know what to do anymore to help them and I feel like I am waiting around for something horrible to happen to them, and at times I almost wish that would come sooner than later as I don't know how much longer I can handle the worrying. As a wise, wise social worker friend told me this week (thanks Friend!) you can't case manage your own family . . . I am so angry at them on so many levels that it feels at times like I will explode.

This week I did. It got to be too much and resorted to cutting again . . .something I haven't done in 6 years. I left therapy the other day and I was seething. Just so angry and I have never really been good at anger. When people in my life got angry, other people got hurt. So I decided long ago that getting angry at other people and letting them know it was not something I would do. I turned it all inward and at 12 began to cut. For me it was a way to feel . . when I was numb and needed the blood to remind me that I was still alive. A way to connect to myself and release some of that pressure that was building up inside. I don't expect others to understand this . . .I know it is not something most people can or want to understand. I used to hurt myself pretty badly and at times needed stitches, yet it wasn't about trying to end my life. I never remember feeling the pain of it all that I did to myself.

This was not true this week. I am not glad that I did it, but I am glad that not only did it hurt like hell, but it also gave me no relief what so ever. In fact for years I have been saying that if I ever went back to that I would be lost . . .I felt out of control during and afterwards as I wasn't sure how I could let myself get to that point again. I almost didn't do it as I knew my DP sees all of me and would know. As I drove around more I devised a story and decided I would do it in a place that I could say I fell or something. I didn't want to lie, but I was too far gone at that point in my head. Like a druggie looking to score I was blinded by the promise that my pain would soon end and I would be in control of my thoughts and feelings again. Little did I know that wasn't in the cards.

I came home and told DP and called shrinky dink. It was a rough day the next day and I am still off kilter. I need to find a way for anger to be appropriately expressed and know that I will not do to others what had been done to me in anger. In talking to DP she noted that in 7.5 years together she has never seen me angry. This, friends, is not ok. I need to be able to let this stuff go, and I also need the experience of being angry with others and not have them hurt me or leave. Shrinky dink say we will work harder on this, and that she will help.

In other news. . .This weekend I watched some kids yesterday and today went to church and did some yard work. We didn't go up to see the folks and it was best that way. Dad seems to be holding his own, and they have diagnosed him with gout. I guess he is in the clear of surgery right now and will be seeing a new doc tomorrow which will be good. This weekend I am in Atlantic City Thu-Saturday for a conference and then next weekend we will go up to see the folks on Sunday. The next weekend we go to TX to visit my brother and little tyke. I am excited about this trip.

In the meantime I am trying to be gentle with myself and not allow this to be the start of a downhill spiral. There's no need for that and I am on a hourly reminder system of that right now.

Meeting Miss Daisy and other random notes

It's been quite a week. We went kayaking last weekend and it was absolutely fabulous!! I can't explain how free I feel on the water . . .gliding through this powerful source of life and being . . .just small me on this great big lake and the trees and birds and animals. It was just great. I even tried a sit inside kayak this time and did great. I was afraid my bum wouldn't fit without a great deal of WD40, but I did well and actually kind of liked it a bit better. I will do a thorough comparison before we ever get one- for the amount of money we spend to rent, I am thinking we should just buy! The place we rent from sells their supply at the end of the season, so maybe we'll go that route.

Then it was just a busy week at work. We had the memorial service for one of the students that passed away a little over a month ago and that was just sad .. .I mean happy to remember him, but the family put together a slide show and it is just rough.

Then on Friday I got to meet my blogger buddy Daisy! and her man friend. It was awesome to put a face and more of a personality to this person who I have been blogging with. Though I was nervous that I would be stood up, and my friends were glad DP was going along in case Daisy ended up being a blogger-phile or something. It was nothing like that! We shared a great meal at Bahama Breeze and chatted about just about everything. I think it was a wonderful start to a great new friendship. Our next mission--GAY BINGO!! I can't wait. Thanks Daisy and Man-Friend for a great night and a warm welcome!

Yesterday we did a whole lot . ..since it had rained all week, we still hadn't buried our last guinea pig friend who died earlier this week. He hung out in the freezer until we could get out there and properly bury him. He died very suddenly--I noticed one day he wasn't looking too well and then that night before we went to bed he died. I think it was because I changed his food-I felt he needed something more exotic . . .and I have serious food issues. DP thinks it is because she was wondering what would could do with the corner in the living room without a big cage there . . .either way he was joined many a friend over the rainbow bridge!

We also went to the dog park where we had a super dog meet up. Three of our friends came and the pups played for about 2 hours. After that they went for baths and I went to get my friend for respite care for the afternoon. We then went to this sad strawberry festival . . .which should have been named " old folks festival". There was one little pot of strawberries and lots of older folk. We were disappointed that there weren't berries to buy, but we had a bowl full and then went back to deal with the garden and the 'hog. This will be another post later.

Then we went to a local fair. Now, this fair was sad because it was small and nothing like DP and I remember a fair being like. Oh, and tit was also on the grounds of the old Franklin Mint Museum which is just now all empty and overgrown and sad looking . . .It was a lot of overpriced games with crappy prizes, and just about anything you could want . . .fried. We did partake of fried oroes as we have seen them before and always wondered. They were yummy, but I could do without eating them again. We did that and then took our friend home.

Then we assembled our new grill that we got for our anniversary. Our cute little Weber Q was not working right, and we decided to upgrade to the real Weber Performer:

We put it together last night without killing each other . . .though we got to the last piece and realized the work surface was broken. No problem . . .we called Weber and they are going to ship a new one right away and send Fex Ex to get the old one. How it that for service. I have never used a charcoal grill before, but I am excited to learn. We also got a veggie basket and pizza maker for the grill . . .hehe . . .I am excited. Rebecky is coming over tonight for our first cook out.

Well, that's about all for now. I am off to church now . . .we have our grand opening for our new building today which will be our worship space until the final phase is done . . .but not for a few ears. I am actually thinking about trying to church hop for the summer and see what I can come up with. I love the church I go to now, and the people are amazing, but I want something that I don't have to feel bad about with the whole gay thing . . .and we found a few churches nearby that are welcoming and affirming churches . . .and I think DP will even check them out with me. Can't beat that!

Ok, over and out or now . . .stay tuned for the more about the 'hog war going on!

Weekend Stuff

We went to the folks house this weekend to paint my childhood room. The room was purple to go along with my white canopy bed and unicorns! I loved that room . . .except when really bad things were happening. Those unicorns and I went to so many places during those times.

It was indeed bittersweet to finally be able to paint over that room, those memories, and everything else to go along with it. I have finally found a place in my world to forgive my brother . . .and this totally helps to get rid of those remaining memories. We redecorated and it looks like a grown up room now!

I even found it in my heart to be decent-no, nice to my mother. I think we had a good weekend.

All together it was good . . .and I needed it to be good.

My weekend . . .in pictures.

The chairs we ordered from By the Yard. They are made from recycled plastic and will apparently last forever. They are really comfortable, and we hope they will hold up. We only had a few extra parts!









The area on the side of our house that has become a mud pit. We decided that it would make a nice shade garden.













We got the little fence, and it was going nicely until we couldn't figure out how to make the middle close. It is being held together with a cable tie. If we decide we like it we will maybe get a real fence in the future. Hopefully the birds will come even with the woofie friends around.







The garden before. We rented a rototiller from Home Depot and an mere hour later we had a garden ready for planting peas--which went in the ground today. We also put up the tomato cages and arranged the rest of the garden area for when our seedlings are ready to plant.
















The after. The soil looks and feels wonderful!














We also tilled a bit of the front of the house and planted some bulbs we pulled up when we moved, and a few that someone from work had given me. We also made a portion of our fence into a gate so that we can get larger pieces of equipment into the yard--such as the stump grinder that will be coming this week to get rid of the stumps. The gate thing was an undertaking, but done This will also work well to get RHB into the back yard if we need at times as well due to her wheelchair.

I am very excited about the garden this year. We got some new cages for the tomatoes since the one last year all broke. We also got some cages for the peppers, eggplants, and peas. We shall see.

How Sweet It Was!!

Helllooo!! I am incredibly stoked to tell you all about what a day I had yesterday. Our friend RHB, after hearing I was going to see James Taylor in Philly, also wanted to go see him and asked if we would want to go to Atlantic City to see him. "OF COURSE!!" I probably shouted. Yesterday was the day.

We drove to AC in the late morning, and we started off gambling a little bit at Bally's. RHB hadn't ever gambled before, and we all had our $20 gambling money and we were having at it. I had decided that I would use $20 of my own allowance money to increase the gambling money I had . . .though it turned out that I didn't need it becasue I hit it BIG!!! I haven't ever won at the casinos--(not that I got often)-maybe once a year, but still!! Check out my earnings-->

Then we headed to the boardwalk where we enjoyed pizza, funnel cake, ice cream, and sticky, icky hazy weather. It was awesome. Then we headed back in to the casino to leave to go to the Borgata where the concert was being held, and where we would eat dinner.

We ate at the Metropolitan in the Casino and it was yummy. Check out the lights that they have in the casino--very cool glass blown lights that didn't photo well, but still were very nifty.

Then we were charged with the task of trying to see if they would let us all sit together at the concert. We had a ticket for RHB and companion--(RHB is in a wheelchair in case I never brought that up). But the third seat was away from the other two, and typically this happens, and we can sometimes get them to allow us to sit together. After all, what fun is it to have to sit by yourself?? We waited a little while before they could agree to this, and we found that we were all going to be able to sit together in the SECOND ROW!! When we sat down the smile came across my face and I don't think it left until I fell asleep.

We were so close!!!! See the pictures below. Now, I have to say something about the contraband photos. When we went to see him in Philly, I followed the rules of the venue to the T--all food in clear containers, only water, no cameras. When we got there, I quickly realized that the rules apparently didn't apply to most folks. This time I was prepared to break the rules and had my cell phone camera and a real camera. Look what I took-->

And then-->this is the best part. I knew from the Philly show that he typically comes out before the second set and signs autographs. I saw folks gathering up front, and I didn't want to go at first because god forbid someone saw me and I drew attention to myself. Then I rationed, when would I ever be this close to James Taylor again???? I took my ticket and went and stood up front. About ten minutes later, from the side of the stage I saw him appear. He came over, knelt down and started signing. He signed for a little boy--who very appropriately said "Thanks Mr. Taylor". It was very cute. Then it was my turn. He took my ticket, signed, and then looked me straight in the eyes and said, "Here you go-enjoy" He had the most crystal clear blue eyes I think I have ever seen--it was amazing. I couldn't get back to my seat after that as I was being squished by many many people trying to get close. One woman-who in an odd turn of events we find works out at the same gym that RHB does-asked him if she could touch him. He put out his hand and shook hers. Check out this picture!!

I got back to my seat and I was just shaking! I couldn't believe I had been that close to him-and more importantly had the bravery to do it. I have missed out on a lot in life because I didn't have the guts to do things, and I am so glad I didn't pass this up. Though-I hope I don't get in trouble for posting contraband photos of JT on my blog.

If I haven't said this, it was absolutely amazing!! The concert was great and I would totally recommend going to see it for anyone who is a fan. My face hurt from smiling all evening. It has been a long time since I felt that free and full of joy. Thanks JT (and RHB)! It was a late evening, and I am tired today, but I couldn't wait to share this with all of you!

What I have been up to!

Well folks--I thought I should get around to writing since my readership is soaring, and there's no better time that in the sweltering heat of the day. Temperatures here today have topped out so far at 99 degrees, and that's just way too damn hot for me. I am just saying. I not one of those folks who waits all winter for warmer weather--I hate sweating and feeling sticky and yucky. I don't let anyone near me unless I am not sweaty and sticky, and that makes for a lot of time apart from those that I love in the heat.

In any case, I have some things to share from the archives of my brain. I am not feeling well today--could be a multitude of things--got my period (third month in a row--what the heck is up with that??), I am tired, it is hot, I am bored with my job, I don't know what to talk about in therapy today . . .see, any number of things. I came home early from work today and corralled all the critters in the bedroom for an air conditioned nap. It went well, though I can't say I feel better. I could also legitimately in fact have something wrong. Who knows.

OK, on to better things. I will, in true beanie fashion give you a bulleted update on my life over the last few weeks. Sit back, relax, keep all hands inside the vehicle . . .

Now, in no particular order . . .

1. We went kayaking yesterday which was so absolutely fun. I must have reiterated how much I loved kayaking about a million times throughout the day. Even after I fell out of the boat... I love kayaking. Yes, it's true. I fell out. I was trying to avoid an oncoming tree limb, and I thought rather than back paddle, I would just duck . . .well, that's easier thought than executed, see when you duck in a kayak you off center yourself and the next thing you know your loved ones are laughing at you, and more worried about the location of the water bottle I was carrying. In all seriousness, I was a lot calmer about the situation that one would have thought given my flare for the dramatic. A nice man came and helped get me back in--since said loved ones just looked at me from afar snickering ;)

2. SIL was visiting this weekend--well, she was herefor work and we were volunteering for the event, Quash-->Check it out. It was like a city wide scavenger hunt type thing. It was good fun, for a good organization. Heck, the rate my father is going I will need the services of the organization soon.

3. My sweet, dearest little friend K. and her sister were in their aunt's wedding last weekend and DP and I went to help out. They both just looked so precious, and I just love being around them-and their family. I am glad we could help out and make the day at least a little bit less stressful for all. K, by the way, is kicking that leukemia right out of her, and doing great. Some rocky times at points, but all in all she is holding her own and has managed to stay out of the hospital for a while now. Keep the prayers and thoughts going her way. Oh, and mom and dad might need some thoughts as they recently adopted two kittens for the girls.

4. Work has been work. Nothing terribly exciting. I have decided to start poking my head around to some other potential job opportunities. I was actually contacted by the director of a program at a major local university asking if I would be interested in applying for a senior research position. Not exactly what I was looking for, but has parts that are appealing. It is a grant funded position, but they have guaranteed funding for 4 years, and he told me that he has a great track record of getting funding. I have also sent my resume to the local children's hospital for consideration in their newly opened research center for autism. I am hoping they have something that will be more clinical than research, but I am open to something new. The idea of being able to take a train to work is really good right now. Took me $45 to fill up my Saturn today . . .too much.

5. We have started to go to obedience school with Addie. She had one session and I don't think she particularly likes the new schooling opportunity. We worked with her one night last week and she got herself all worked up that she threw up. We hope tomorrow will go well, though it is going to be hot as all get out again and the training takes place in this opened warehouse/garage thing. Luckily it is DP's turn to work with her. The class is 8 weeks and we will trade off each week on who actually handles her, and the other will watch.

6. We love our neighbors. They are just so nice and we couldn't ask for better ones--did I also mention that they have a pool? Yes, they do and they are very open to us using it whenever we want. I have to say though, their daughter came over Sunday and we had grand plans to use the pool, and she had to go be all up in it. The nerve. So we didn't go in. We did buy a wading pool for Addie--she seemed to like it-though we had to "help" her like it.

7. I saw James Taylor last weekend and it was fabulous. I went with one of my bestest friends, and we had a good time. She thought we had lawn seats, and we got there super early and scoped out a great seat. So then I am looking at the tickets again, and it turns out that we had actual seats and didn't know it. It was good fun. And guess what??? I am going again this weekend to see him at the Borgota in Atlantic City with our friend RHB . . .those seats are in the second row--SECOND ROW!!???!! I think I might pee myself being that close. The venue itself isn't that big-so I am very excited.

8. Weight loss update-->there is no weight loss. There was some gainage over the holiday weekend, but I am back to where I was before-which is still the lowest I have been. I have been trying to do better, but it just seems that I can never get it right. I will be starting to go to a PCOS support/therapy group starting in July which is run by a nutritionist that I used to see, and some therapist lady. It will be good I think to talk with others who have having food and PCOS issues.

9. I have a boy that is in love with me . . .he is 4 years old. He just loves me very very much, and asks for me a lot--so much so that he drives his mother crazy. He looks at me with googley eyes, and asks when I am going to come back. He is so stinking cute. His little sister is very advanced for her age. It is fun to be around typical kids sometimes--reminds me that not all kids are autistic and so needy.

Um, I guess that's is for right now. I hope all is well in your corners!!

Weekend to remember

Memorial Day weekend was great. We had a slight change in plans, which was a bummer, but it ended up working out. Turns out DP's cousin found out two weeks ago that he wasn't going to graduate, and he overdosed and tried to kill himself last Wednesday. Needless to say there was no graduation, and we scrambled to figure out what was going to happen since he was in a hospital about 2 hours from the place we were to be staying at--and we were determined to go away.

We rearranged our plans and ended up staying in Sawyer, Michigan near Warren Dunes State Park. Here are some photos from the park . . .

Her parents were already staying there Thursday night before heading to the other location, so they extended their stay and we drove over there. It was about an 11 hour drive both ways for us, for about 1.25 days with her family. Saturday we ended up meeting up with the other cousins and family at their hotel and hanging out. It was good that most everyone could still see each other and support each other. The young lad is doing ok, and it seemed he might be released today to the care of professionals closer to home.

While there, we went on a dune ride which was so totally cool. The driver was fabulous, and had been doing this for like 24 years. You could tell he loved what he did and enjoyed the people. Here are some photos from our ride . . .

This picture was from inside the park as well, and you can see this is a huge tree that a dune has covered up. It was amazing to see, since you thought you were looking at small trees in the sand--until he told you it was a large tree that a dune had encased.

Addie stayed with my parents, and she was sick as a dog. Her intestinal system was all out of whack, and she had runny bottom, and accidents in the house. Good thing my folks love animals, or I think should would have been out on the porch. She still isn't right and has started to vomit as well. We have decided that we will just put her back on the food that she did well with, and abandon the idea that she can eat the raw food kibble. I guess her tummy just can't handle it. The vomiting is new though, and we aren't quite sure what that is about. She has an appointment with the vet on Saturday, and we got the other food today. I just want her to be well. She is such an awesome dog, and it sucks that she has had it so rough.

I think I may have mentioned also that we had a birds nest with three eggs in it. Well, the eggs have hatched, and we saw one baby and wondered what happened to the others. We looked around and didn't see anything. Upon closer inspection today I saw one of the babies dangling from the rose bush--this is where mama has nested. I am not sure what to do about dangling baby bird (which is dead), since I don't want to get that close to the nest, but now that I see it there, I keep thinking of the poor thing. The one that we see that is alive is strangely cute, but that still leaves one missing baby. Mama is very attentive to the nest. Any ideas on what to do with the baby that didn't make it??

***UPDATE*** The neighbor has reported that he sorta kinda ran over a deadish baby bird with the lawn mower tonight. He saw it too late, but it was dead, and now it is recycled back to the earth . . .I guess. He said he noticed yesterday that there were large black birds circling around and squawking. He wondered if they hadn't raided the nest. On a happier note, I looked in there today (carefully avoiding the dangling birdie) and saw the very much alive bird with his head perched on the side of the nest just looking out--it was very cute- (though I secretly hoped that he didn't know his sibling was dangling below, and if he saw, I hoped he thought it was just bungee jumping for fun!)

In other news, the beans are coming up wonderfully, and DP planted the peppers and tomatoes that we got from dad. Seems we also have two stray pumpkin plants coming up . . .

OK, gotta run, puking puppy . . .

Post Traumatic Cheese Steak Syndrome

Thank you folks for NOT holding your breath for this one. I apologize for the delay, but I have been undergoing intense psychiatric treatment for this and I am only now ready to talk about it.

So, there's the tale of two cheese steak places . . .We'll call them Pat's and Geno's for lack of better names. I even happen to have a photo of these fictitious places. Not sure how I conjured them up, but alas.

We had DP's sister here to visit us from Minneapolis, and we thought it would be fun to go get a real south Philadelphia Cheese steak. After all, they are famous, and some places are even making headline news.

We head down to the city for some fun, and as lunch time approaches our stomachs are aching for some cheese steak. We find a perfect, and close parking space-which by the looks of the surroundings was quite a find! We approach the corner and we see our two options. Sister says that she's been to Pat's before and thinks we should go there. We have no loyalties, and so we go.

First of all, the line was wrapped around the building. Once could only hope this meant that the steaks they had were to die for-literally since as you can see in the above pictures, people stand in the middle if the street for these things at Geno's.

Secondly, we are noticing the line moving quickly-though still quite long with storm clouds looming ahead. This is good cause as I mentioned before, we were hungry. Still unsuspecting of what was to come, we dream of our cheese steaks and fries. What would we do in the event of rain? Nothing would deter us from our mission.

As we round the corner where we see the counter, the anticipation grows and we become nervous. Things are moving very quickly, and we rapidly take in the sign that gives you instructions on how to order.Easy enough, right? We get nearer the counter and things are moving at breakneck speed. We see meat flying, onions flying, and hear lots and lots of yelling. Turns out the way they keep the line moving is to YELL at you. "Have your money ready" Let's Go, Let's go" What do you want?" Let's go, let's go" Move it, Move it" I am scared . . .

Let me set the scene. There is a window that says steaks only, and we are thinking we want steaks and fries. We are not sure if you can order all those items at this window. Thinking it is like a cheese steak express line, we go to the next window, which we are yelled at again and told now that it is only for fries and drinks. We try and BACKTRACK to the steak window, which has now processed about 50 people in one minute and those people are not liking the fact that we are now trying to get back there. Everything is moving so quickly that I have forgotten how to order-I need the Cliff's notes and I can't think, I am being yelled at, and I have no freaking idea what I want. There's no time to think when ordering your cheese steak in Philly. DP ended up with a cheese steak with cheese wiz on it cause she didn't know what she was doing and got scared, and I got mine mostly right, but I had a ton of onions as I guess I uttered the code word for butt load of onions.

Then we are thrown our sandwiches and change, literally, and the dictator starts yelling again, "MOVE IT, MOVE IT". We get to the next window and there is more yelling, more money throwing, and little time to think. Finally we all walk away with cheese steak and half filled fountain drinks and some fries. We look stunned. We try and find the ketchup station, and after we locate that and look for a table, we find that there is none to be found. We end up sitting on a stoop of an abandoned store with our food across the street.

Let me add in here that it is not too long ago that I was heavily medicated for OCD, and we are sitting here with greasy steaks, fries, on a dirty stoop-- with 2 napkins to share between the three of us. None of this matters now because we have the beloved Philly cheese steak in hand, and we have the battle wounds to prove it. The anticipation is too much to handle and we bite in with such abandon . . .only to find . . .

it's a cheese steak. . . Nothing special .. .after all that we'd had such high expectations and were quite disappointed. The fries were cold, the steak was greasy, and all together a waste of a few million calories.

So there you have it. Between the yelling, the dirty eating accommodations, the million calories, and disappointing finish, you can see why I have affectionately called this Post traumatic cheese steak syndrome.

I say next time we stick to this cheese steak place-Tony Luke's in Philadelphia. The steaks were better when we went last year with DP's family, and there was no psychological abuse involved. I drove by the scene of the event yesterday and I began to shake. I am sure in the distance I saw flying cheese steaks and heard the sounds of screaming men-just as I put the pedal to the metal and drove far, far away.

The End.

Weekend Teaser

OK, so stay tuned for an upcoming post on the following:

1. Post Traumatic Cheese steak syndrome
2. Why I spent an hour quacking like a duck this weekend
3. What I saw hanging from a store front window

uh, well, that's doesn't sound as impressive as I thought it might . . .

It will. You. just.wait!

Better

Helllooo!

OK, for those of you that thought I had succumbed to the dark side, I would like to reassure you that I am ok. Things have been busy the last few days, but I had a good weekend and I am looking forward to my week. I have a light week ahead, a trip to the dentist (which I am SOOO looking forward to . .an aside, I've gone to the dentist every six months for like the last 30 years, and because of the job switch it has been longer and I need clean teeth, I need them NOW), getting our taxes done, and finally, a visit from a certified arborist. What could be better?

I will write more soon. I promise. Off to bed. Tonights dinner was oatmeal chocolate chip cookies. I feel slightly ill. DP, who has been a bad influence on me the last few days, has promised we are back on the bandwagon tomorrow. I am so easily swayed . .

Hope all of you are well.

**Update**

I recognize that I am an adult and have made my own decisions about what I do or do not eat, and therefore should not blame others for what I do or do not do. It is not fair of me to blame others, and for that I apologize!

Quick check-in

This past week was very, very busy. I had a bunch of home visits, meetings, and extra curricular activities. Here's a few of the highlights:

1. Weekly weigh in- Lost another 2.1 lbs for a grand total of 12.1 lbs so far. I had a very NOT low carb day yesterday and tonight we are having pizza-you know, in honor of the superbowl.

2. I saw Avenue Q yesterday at the Forrest Theater in Philadelphia and it was fabulous. We saw it on Broadway a few years back and this was just as great!

3. Last night I saw Livingston Taylor . . .it was the neatest venue and a really great concert. Thanks RHB for inviting me!!

3a. I co-facilitate a sibling group for kids who have special needs siblings and this week I planned and ran the group. It went really, really well and I felt good about what I had done and how the kids responded.

4. This week we have a crazy busy week. I have a few trainings at work, and lots of new referrals. We are also doing respite care for our friend M. for the next three days. Should be a quick week . ..

5. Finally took down the Christmas decorations today . . .tree is still up, but that is our halftime project.

OK, I gotta run since the game is starting in 17 minutes!! Hope all is well in your corners!

Catching up

I know I have been less than exciting on this blog the last few days, but things have been good-but busy, too.

Friday night we went out to dinner and then to a concert with RHB and some friends. It was fun to hang out-and we even started up an impromptu game of scrabble while we waited--since we'd gotten there early to get good seats. The concert was ok, but it was even more fun to be with friends. I was reminded again about how I lust over those who can play the guitar, and yearn for the day I, too, can play. Though I never do much about it-I even have a guitar, but I lack the motivation. I think because it seems so impossible that I could actually play anything good. Maybe that will be a new year's resolution.

Then Saturday we had a guy over to give us an estimate on putting glass block windows in our basement. The windows down there now are scary and have a few holey spots in them, and energy wise it makes sense. The I went to an autism support group meeting to promote my program. Then DP and I were both providing childcare to different families, so I went to see her and her charge for a bit, then went to mine.

My two girls are by far the coolest kids ever. The younger one, age 3, has down syndrome and I met them about 2 years ago. This little girl has made so many strides and is just the cutest thing possible. They were excited to see me-it has been about 6 months since I have seen them, and it was just a fun time. Great parents, great kids, and some cash to throw in the pot.

Today I went to church and then ran around preparing for the in-laws to visit this week. We did the Thanksgiving shopping, and ordered the stuffing and mashed potatoes from Whole Foods-hope they are good. I don't think I realized how expensive a Thanksgiving meal can be . . .I will attempt to make sweet potato casserole. I'll keep you posted on how that goes since I am NOT known for my cooking!!

I got my hair cut today, as well. I am one that really could care less about what my hair looks like, I just don't want it to take a lot of time to have to do. So today I trotted off the hair place and got it cut short again. I think it looks cute-but then it always does the day you get it cut . . .

Should be a very busy week, and I hope to be able to enjoy the upcoming visits and such. I hope you are all doing well and finding time to remember what it is that you are thankful for.

Fuzzy Hearing

DP and I took a ride to the local Target tonight and as we were walking around she mentioned something to me about the display of "crock cheese" and how it was a sign of the holidays. Well, I turned my head and I said, quite loudly "CROTCH CHEESE? What is THAT?"

Needless to say we had quite the laugh about that one for the rest of the night.

We has a lovely evening. I had to see two clients this afternoon. One very interesting one. A single mom who has a boy who was diagnosed with PDD last year, and this year the school tested him again and he is not testing autistic-AT ALL. I have to say, when I saw him last week for the first time I did not think he was autistic-not even aspergers. I thought maybe MR, but I don't think that either. Mom was very upset by this and was going to fight for him to be put in an autistic support class. I tried my darnedest to explain that he would still get the services that were needed-in this case speech therapy and some special education support.

It was hard to sit with this mom and see her struggle. I gather that it is somewhat challenging to have a child who is behaviorally difficult, and NOT have something to blame it on. So if she can't say that the child is autistic and he he having a behavioral episode, the she just supposes folks see her as a bad mom, rather than a mom of a challenging child. She is holding onto the label for dear life-and I didn't' think anything I said today was of any help.

I saw a new family today. Clearly not one that met the low-income requirements-the spa on the back porch of their sprawling house gave them away. They were in need of the services none the less, so I worked with them and will probably meet with them one more time. They had a very cute little girl . . .nice family.

Then DP and I put the big storm windows on the windows that actually had them and stored away all the outdoor furniture. We then went to dinner at Five Guys famous Burgers and Fries
All I have to say is YUM, YUM, YUM. They only make burgers, fries, and hot dogs. I heard a nun at physical therapy once raving over this place, and we decided to try it tonight. We got there and they had peanuts on the table for you while you waited. Then we got the most delicious burgers and fries. It was really good and the place was hopping.

Then we were off to the Lowes to price digital thermometers and outdoor lights. DP's family will be coming on over Thanksgiving and we will have a list of things for dad to do while here-two of which are to install said thermometer and lights!! Also, more importantly is to puppy-proof the back yard!!

Then we went to Target for a humidifier to replace the penguin one we had that broke for no good reason. There we had the aforementioned hearing mishap. Then we went to this yummy place for ice cream and bought a cookies and cream caramel apple for tomorrow.

I am tired now. . . and just under the wire for this post today!!

Weekend Round-up

We had a good weekend here!! DP and I went to get our pumpkins this weekend . . .I wish I could say we rummaged through the field and grabbed the most perfect ones-but we went to a place that has them already picked and somewhat sorted by size. We picked two each, and then one for the Cat and guinea pigs . . we will decorate said pumpkins on Wednesday. I think the cat should decorate her own, but that could prove messy!

The we went on a hayride . . .it was nice. They had two hayrides going at one-one for the little kids that went past a witches house where the witch told a story. Then there was the other one. There were 6 couples on our hayride and it was fun. We were deposited at a bonfire where we got cider and roasted marshmallows. FUN!!

Though I have to say, I had a moment where I was kinda pissed off at our world. I wanted to be holding DP's hand and being close like the other couples, but clearly it was not the time or place. I told her I wished we could move to P-Town and she reminded me we looked into this already and we would only be able to afford a speck of sand in P-Town-if that!!

Then we went shopping to buy some cooler weather staples. I have lost about 20 lbs since last winter and in looking through my clothes it was evident that I needed some new digs. I still don't know what kind of attire I should be wearing in this new job, but for now I am sticking with khakis and shirts. I found that I had a large number of dressy pants that I had accumulated over the years that I kept even though they did not fit. So now I can wear them. YEAH!!

DP took a class this weekend-she is attempting to take more classes to move her up on the teacher's payscale!! GO beanie, go!! Show us the money. I also went to a social work seminar with this guy who works with children who have been involved in or who have witnessed traumatic events-like murders, violence, etc. It was weird-while I could NEVER do that kind of social work, I was fascinated by what he got to do and how he did it. It was like social work meets CSI/Law and Order. I am so glad there are people out there who can work with people in ways that I can't . . .I suppose that is what makes the world go round-or keeps it from bouncing all around at least!!

The rest of the work week went well. I have decided to nix taking the subway after I get into the city. So now I am walking the 10 blocks each way from the train to the office. I am finding it somewhat relaxing . . it would be even better if I didn't sweat so much-even when it is cold out I sweat. Oh well. I was sore by weeks end-mostly from my shoulder-I need to reduce how much I am carrying in my bag . . .I suspect it will get easier. I have to say though, I would rather lift weights for hours than to walk . . I don't like it. I think my alignment is all out of whack and it is not the most comfortable thing to do.

This week I have at least two visits that I will make on my own, and I have the orientation for new employees. That should be fun. I got to work from home on Friday, and my task was to re-do all the forms that they created last year. This is a FANTASTIC task for me since I love LOVE making forms!! I finished all but one of them, and that is because I am not sure of the purpose of the last remaining form . . .Oh well.

Next weekend we will go to see my brother and family-- and my mother, father, and other brother will be there. It will be nice to spend some time with the peanut (the nephew). I can't believe how much he has grown. We spent much more time with him when he was younger, and much less recently. They finally sent the neurotic live in mother-in-law packing and put him in daycare (now that is a whole other entry!!). He really needed it though, because at 3 1/2 he doesn't have great socialization skills. They reported that he has done well in the two weeks he has been there, and even told them he wanted to stay when they went to pick him up on the first day!!

Hope your weekends were just as productive!!